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紫霞仙客的博客

我和我的女儿 我和我的学生

 
 
 

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心灵鸡汤五十篇 5  

2010-01-21 20:40:35|  分类: 默认分类 |  标签: |举报 |字号 订阅

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41.爱和时间Love &Time

爱是人类永恒的话题,时间也是人们生生不息探求的领域,那么把爱和时间放在一起会有怎么样的化学反应呢?

Once upon a time, there was an island where all the feelings lived: Happiness, Sadness, Knowledge, and all of the others, including Love. One day it was announced to the feelings that the island would sink, so all constructed boats and left. Except for Love.

Love was the only one who stayed. Love wanted to hold out until the last possible moment.

When the island had almost sunk, Love decided to ask for help.

Richness was passing by Love in a grand boat. Love said,"Richness, can you take me with you?"

Richness answered, "No, I can't. There is a lot of gold and silver in my boat. There is no place here for you."

Love decided to ask Vanity who was also passing by in a beautiful vessel. "Vanity, please help me!"

"I can't help you, Love. You are all wet and might damage my boat," Vanity answered.

Sadness was close by so Love asked, "Sadness, let me go with you."

"Oh . . . Love, I am so sad that I need to be by myself!"

Happiness passed by Love, too, but she was so happy that she did not even hear when Love called her.

Suddenly, there was a voice, "Come, Love, I will take you." It was an elder. So blessed and overjoyed, Love even forgot to ask the elder where they were going. When they arrived at dry land, the elder went her own way. Realizing how much was owed the elder,

Love asked Knowledge, another elder, "Who Helped me?"

"It was Time," Knowledge answered.

"Time?" asked Love. "But why did Time help me?"

Knowledge smiled with deep wisdom and answered, "Because only Time is capable of understanding how valuable Love is."

中文:从前有一个岛,所有的情感都住在那里:幸福、悲伤、知识和所有其它的,爱也不例外。一天,所有的情感听说小岛即将沉没,因此建造小船,纷纷离开,除了爱。 

  爱是唯一留下来的,因为它希望能坚持到最后一刻。

  小岛即将沉没了,爱决定请求帮助。

  富有驾着一艘大船从爱身边经过,爱说,“富有,你能带上我么?”

  富有回答说:“不行,我的船上载满金银财宝,没有你的地方。”

  虚荣坐在漂亮的小船中从爱身边驶过,爱问:“虚荣,你能帮助我么?”

  虚荣说:“不行,你全身湿透,会弄脏我的船。”

  悲伤的船靠近了,爱问:“悲伤,请带我走吧。”

  “哦。。。爱,我太难过了,想一个人呆着。”

  幸福经过爱的身边,它太开心了,根本没听见爱在呼唤。

  突然,一个声音喊道:“来,爱,我带你走。” 声音来自“年老”。爱太高兴了,甚至忘了问他们即将去何方。当他们来到岸上,年老自己离开了。爱突然意识到“年老”给了它多大的帮助。

  于是,爱问另一位老者--知识:“谁帮助了我?”

  知识说:“是时间。”

  “时间?”爱问:“但是时间为什么帮助我?”

  知识睿智地微笑道:“因为只有时间了解爱的价值。”

42.母亲节献礼:天使-妈妈

Once upon a time there was a child ready to be born.

One day he asked God: "They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?"

GOD replied, "Among the many angels, I chose one for you. She will be waiting for you and will take care of you."

"But tell me, here in Heaven, I don't do anything else but sing and smile, that's enough for me to be happy."

"Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you every day. And you will feel your angel's love and be happy."

"And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me, if I don't know the language that men talk?"

"Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak."

"And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?"

"Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray."

"I've heard that on earth there are bad men. Who will protect me?"

"Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its life."

"But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore."

"Your angel will always talk to you about me and will teach you the way for you to come back to me, even though I will always be next to you."

At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from earth could already be heard.

And the child in a hurry asked softly: "Oh God, if I am about to leave now, please tell me my angel's name."

"Your angel's name is of no importance, you will call your angel: 'Mommy'."

43.启示:亡羊补牢,尤未迟也  It's Never Too Late 

Several years ago, while attending a communications course, I experienced a most unusual process. The instructor asked us to list anything in our past that we felt ashamed of, guilty about, regretted, or incomplete about. The next week he invited participants to read their lists aloud. This seemed like a very private process, but there's always some brave soul in the crowd who will volunteer. As people read their lists, mine grew longer. After three weeks, I had 101 items on my list. The instructor then suggested that we find ways to make amends, apologize to people, or take some action to right any wrongdoing. I was seriously wondering how this could ever improve my communications, having visions of alienating just about everyone from my life.

                   instructor n. 教师  wrongdoing n. 坏事、不道德行为  alienate v. 疏远

     The next week, the man next to me raised his hand and volunteered this story: 

"While making my list, I remembered an incident from high school. I grew up in a small town in Iowa. There was a sheriff in town that none of us kids liked. One night, my two buddies and I decided to play a trick on Sheriff Brown. After drinking a few beers, we found a can of red paint, climbed the tall water tank in the middle of town, and wrote, on the tank, in bright red letters: Sheriff Brown is an s.o.b. The next day, the town arose to see our glorious sign. Within two hours, Sheriff Brown had my two pals and me in his office. My friends confessed and I lied, denying the truth. No one ever found out.

                  sheriff n. 治安官  buddy n. 密友、伙伴  s.o.b. (缩写)畜生、狗娘养的

     "Nearly 20 years later, Sheriff Brown's name appears on my list. I didn't even know if he was still alive. Last weekend, I dialed information in my hometown back in Iowa. Sure enough, there was a Roger Brown still listed. I dialed his number. After a few rings, I heard: 'Hello?' I said: 'Sheriff Brown?' Pause. 'Yup.' 'Well, this is Jimmy Calkins. And I want you to know that I did it.' Pause. 'I knew it!' he yelled back. We had a good laugh and a lively discussion. His closing words were: 'Jimmy, I always felt badly for you because your buddies got it off their chest, and I knew you were carrying it around all these years. I want to thank you for calling me...for your sake.' " 

                  yell v. 大叫、忍不住笑  sake n. 缘故、理由

Jimmy inspired me to clear up all 101 items on my list. It took me almost two years, but became the springboard and true inspiration for my career as a conflict mediator. No matter how difficult the conflict, crisis or situation, I always remember that it's never too late to clear up the past and begin resolution. 

                     springboard n. 出发点  mediator n. 调停者

中文:几年前,我参加了一个人际关系方面的课程,其间有过一次独特的经历。老师要求我们列出过去自己曾感羞愧、负疚、缺憾和悔恨的事情。一周后他请大家大声宣读自己所列的清单。这看起来有涉隐私,但确总有勇敢之人自告奋勇。听了别人的陈述,我的清单愈发长起来,3周之后竟达101条之多。之后老师建议我们想法弥补缺憾,向别人真诚道歉,采取行动来纠正自己的过失。我对此举能够增进我的人际关系深表疑惑,相反却认为这只能使彼此更加疏远。

  一周后,我身旁的一位老兄举手发言,讲了如下这个故事:

  我在列举清单时,想起高中时发生的一件事情,我在衣阿华州的一个小镇长大。镇上有个我们孩子们都讨厌的官员。有天晚上,我和两个伙计决定要捉弄这个叫布朗的官员一番。喝了几瓶啤酒,找到一罐红颜料,我们爬到镇子中央的高高水塔之上,在上面用鲜红的颜料写道:“布朗是个狗娘养的”。第二天,镇上的人们起来后都看到了我们的“大作”。两小时后,布朗把我们3个人弄到他的办公室。我的伙计们承认了错误而我却撒谎抵赖、蒙混过关。

  这事都快过去20年了。今天布朗的名字出现在我的清单上。我不知道他是否仍在人世。上个周末,我给衣阿华州的家乡打电话查问,果然有个叫罗杰-布朗的先生。我于是给他打电话。铃声响了几下后,我听到:“喂,你好。”我问:“你就是那个叫布朗的官员?”那边沉默了一下,“是的。”“那好,我是吉米-考金斯,我想告诉你那事我也有份。”又是沉默。“我早就知道。”他嚷道。我们于是大笑,相谈得很愉快。他最后说:“吉米,我一直为你感到不安,因为你的伙计们都已摘掉了心病,而你这么多年却一直挂在心上。我想应该感谢你打来电话……这是为你着想。”

44.论和谐——托马斯-布朗    Of Harmony

It is my temper, and I like it the better, to affect all harmony: and sure there is musick even in the beauty, and the silent note which Cupid strikes, far sweeter than the sound of an instrument. For there is a musick where ever there is a harmony, order, or proportion: and thus far we may maintain the music of the Sphears; for those well-ordered motions, and regular paces, though they give no sound unto the ear, yet to the understanding they strike a note most full of harmony. Whatsoever is harmonically composed delights in harmony; which makes me much distrust the symmetry of those heads which declaim against all Church-Musick. For my self, not only for my obedience, but my particular Genius, I do embrace it: for even that vulgar and Tavern-Musick, which makes one man merry, another mad, strikes in me a deep fit of devotion, and a profound contemplation of the First Composer. There is something in it of Divinity more than the ear discovers: it is an Hieroglyphical and shadowed lesson of the whole World, and creatures of GOD; such a melody to the ear, as the whole World, well understood, would afford the understanding. In brief, it is a sensible fit of that harmony which intellectually sounds in the ears of GOD.

  注释:

  1、harmony:n. 融洽、和谐、协调                       2、temper:n. 性情、脾气

  3、note:n. 音符                                                   4、Cupid:爱神丘比特

  5、whatsoever:无论什么                                      6、compose:v. 著、撰、组成

  7、distrust:v. 不信任                                           8、symmetry:n. 对称、匀称

  9、obedience:n. 服从、顺从                                10、contemplation:n. 沉思

  11、divinity:n. 神、神性                                      12、hieroglyphical:n. 象形文字

  13、melody:n. 悦耳的音调

  中文:我生性耽爱一切之和谐,于此,我且颇以自得;确实,甚至在鸩彼得所奏放的无声音籁之中与美感之内,无不有音乐的存在,其吐音之佳妙迥出一般乐器之上。此亦缘音乐即在和谐、秩序与比例匀称之中,而星际乐声一说至少可以此为部分依据;其秩序井然之动作,节拍分明之步武,此在常人耳中虽悄无声息,然在颖慧者听来,确乃和谐无艺之妙乐。大凡和谐构成之物,必喜和谐,据此,则彼辈攻击一切教堂音乐者,其头脑之中是否尚有匀称二字,我实不能不深致疑虑。至于我自己,我对上述之音乐确实服膺无已,此固与我之虔诚信仰有关,亦系我的特殊禀赋所致;甚即通常旅店之俚俗音乐,所叙不出嬉乐激切之情,尚能使我对那最初制曲人于胸臆之中顿生仰慕之忱与遥深之想;其中圣洁处有非人耳所能察觉者。它是茫茫世界芸芸众生的一篇佶屈恢诡的天启,使上下尘寰彻悟之后捧供识者聆赏的一阙悠扬的妙乐。要言之,它是上彻天听的玲珑曼妙的仙籁的阵阵和谐。

注:本段文字节选自Thomas Browne的名著——《一位医生的信仰》(Religio Medici)的第二章第二节。

45.我的座右铭:生活半对半   The 50-Percent Theory of Life 

I believe in the 50-percent theory. Half the time things are better than normal; the other half, they are worse. I believe life is a pendulum swing. It takes time and experience to understand what normal is, and that gives me the perspective to deal with the surprises of the future. 

     Let's benchmark the parameters: Yes, I will die. I've dealt with the deaths of both parents, a best friend, a beloved boss and cherished pets. Some of these deaths have been violent, before my eyes, or slow and agonizing. Bad stuff, and it belongs at the bottom of the scale. 

    Then there are those high points: romance and marriage to the right person; having a child and doing those Dad things like coaching my son's baseball team, paddling around the creek in the boat while he's swimming with the dogs, discovering his compassion so deep it manifests even in his kindness to snails, his imagination so vivid he builds a spaceship from a scattered pile of Legos. 

But there is a vast meadow of life in the middle, where the bad and the good flip-flop acrobatically. This is what convinces me to believe in the 50-percent theory. 

One spring I planted corn too early in a bottomland so flood-prone that neighbors laughed. I felt chagrined at the wasted effort. Summer turned brutal -- the worst heat wave and drought in my lifetime. The air-conditioner died, the well went dry, the marriage ended, the job lost, the money gone. I was living lyrics from a country tune -- music I loathed.

Only a surging Kansas City Royals team, bound for their first World Series, buoyed my spirits. 

Looking back on that horrible summer, I soon understood that all succeeding good things merely offset the bad. Worse than normal wouldn't last long. I am owed and savor the halcyon times. They reinvigorate me for the next nasty surprise and offer assurance that I can thrive. The 50 percent theory even helps me see hope beyond my Royals' recent slump, a field of struggling rookies sown so that some year soon we can reap an October harvest. 

Oh, yeah, the corn crop? For that one blistering summer, the ground moisture was just right, planting early allowed pollination before heat withered the tops, and the lack of rain spared the standing corn from floods. That winter my crib overflowed with corn -- fat, healthy three-to-a-stalk ears filled with kernels from heel to tip -- while my neighbors' fields yielded only brown, empty husks. 

Although plantings past may have fallen below the 50-percent expectation, and they probably will again in the future, I am still sustained by the crop that flourishes during the drought. 

中文:我信奉对半理论。生活时而无比顺畅,时而倒霉透顶,好坏参半。我觉得生活就像来回晃动的钟摆。读懂生活的常态需要时间和阅历,也正是这样才练就了我面对未来荣辱不惊的生活态度。 

  让我们掂量这些点点滴滴:是的,我注定会死去。我已经经历了双亲的仙逝,一位友人的亡故,一位敬爱的老板的离逝,还有心爱宠物的死亡。当中一些变故突如其来,直击眼前;有些却长期折磨,痛苦不堪。糟糕的事儿,它们驻留谷底。

  当然生活也不乏熠熠光彩:坠入爱河缔结良缘;养育幼子身为人父,训练儿子的棒球队,当他和狗在水中嬉戏时,摇桨划船前瞻后顾,感受他如此强烈的同情心——即使对蜗牛也善待有加,发现他如此活跃的想像力——即使零散的积木也能堆出太空飞船。

 但在它们发生期间有一片宽广的草坪,在那儿上演的各种好事坏事像耍杂技一样地翻新。这就是让我信服对半理论的原因。

  有一年春天,我在一片容易被淹的低洼地过早地种下了玉米,邻居们都为此嘲笑我。一番心血付之东流让我懊恼不已。接着我生命中最难熬的酷暑来临了——热浪袭人,酿至旱灾。空调失灵,水井枯竭,婚姻破裂,惨遭失业,积蓄挥空。我正经历某个乡村调频描绘的情节,我讨厌这种音乐。只有一支人气攀升的堪萨斯皇家棒球队的小组因他们的第一次出征世界大赛团结起来使我精神振奋。

  回想那个可怕的夏天,我不久就明白了所有的好事坏事不过是正负抵消。不顺心的境遇不会延宕过久。太平时光是我应得的,我要尽情享受。它们给我新的活力以应对突如其来的险境,并确保我再度辉煌。对半理论甚至帮我在我喜爱的皇家棒球队最近的低潮中看到希望——这是一块艰难行进的新手们耕耘的土地,播种了,假以时日我们就可以收获十月的金秋。

  哦,对了,玉米收成?就那年炎热的夏天,庄稼地的湿度恰到好处,过早的种植使授粉避开酷热在顶梢干枯前完成,雨水稀少使地里长着的玉米免遭水灾。那年冬天,我的粮仓里堆满了玉米——饱满结实的玉米每株秆上结三个,每个玉米从底到顶端长满了玉米粒——而我的邻居们地里长出来的只是暗沉干瘪的壳。

  尽管过去播种的收获没有达到50%的期望,而且将来也可能是这样,我仍然要为经历旱季依然丰收的玉米而坚守阵地。

46.苹果CEO自述:与死神擦肩

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything -- all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure -- these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7∶30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn't even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor's code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you'd have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes. 

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I'm fine now.

This was the closest I've been to facing death, and I hope it's the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma -- which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary. 

中文:17岁的时候,我读到了一句格言,好像是:“如果你把每一天都当作生命中最后一天去生活的话,肯定有一天你会是正确的。”这句话给我留下了深刻的印象。自那以后,在过去的33年中我每天早晨都会对着镜子问自己:“如果今天是我生命中的最后一天,我会去做今天打算做的那些事吗?”每当答案连续多日都是“不会”的时候,我知道我该做些改变了。

  提醒自己我即将死去,是帮我做出人生中许多重大抉择的最重要的工具。因为几乎所有的一切——所有他人的期望、荣耀、面子问题和对失败的恐惧——这些在死亡面前都会消失殆尽,留下的是真正重要的东西。提醒自己我将要死去,我认为是避免患得患失的最好办法。你本来就一无所有,没有理由不顺心而为。

  大约一年前, 我被诊断出得了癌症。我在早晨7点半做了扫描, 扫描结果清楚地显示我的胰腺上长了一个肿瘤。我当时甚至都不知道胰腺是什么东西。医生告诉我,这基本上是一种无法治愈的癌症, 我活在世上的时间不会超过3~6个月。医生劝我回家,安排后事,这是医生让病人等死的婉言。这意味着你要尽量把本来想在未来10年内对孩子们说的话在几个月里说完;意味着你要把一切安排妥当,让你的家人尽可能地轻松一点;意味着你要说“再见”了。

 诊断结果让我想了一整天。那天晚上晚些时候,我做了活组织切片检查。医生将一个内窥镜从我的喉咙伸进去,通过我的胃, 进入我的肠子, 然后用一根针刺进我的胰腺,在肿瘤上提取了一些细胞。我当时注射了镇定剂,但在场的妻子后来告诉我,医生在显微镜下观察这些细胞的时候,忽然叫了起来, 因为我患的竟然是一种非常罕见的、可以用手术治愈的胰腺癌。我做了手术,现在痊愈了。

  那是我与死神擦肩而过的一次, 我希望这也是以后几十年最接近死神的一次。以前死亡对于我只是一个有用但抽象的概念,有了这次经历后,我现在可以更加确信地对你们说:

  没有人愿意死, 即使人们想上天堂, 也不会为了去那里而死。但是死亡是我们每个人共同的归宿,无人幸免。也应该如此,因为死亡很可能是生命惟一最好的发明。它是生命变化更替的推动力。它破旧立新。你们现在是新人,但是不久的将来,你们会慢慢变老,然后被清除掉。我很抱歉这很戏剧性,但事实就是这样。 

  你们的时间很有限, 所以不要把时间浪费在重复他人的生活上。不要受教条的束缚,因为那就意味着你依据别人的思想在生活。不要让他人喋喋不休的意见淹没掉你自己内心的声音。最重要的是, 要勇于听从你内心的直觉。可以说,内心的直觉早已知道你想要成为什么样的人,而其他一切都是次要的。

47.就为了今天 Just for Today

Just for today I will try to live through this day only and not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

Just for today I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said, that "Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be."

Just for today I will adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my "luck" as it comes.

Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.

Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways. I will do somebody a good turn and not get found out: If anybody knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don't want to do—just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt: they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.

Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, talk low, act courteously, criticize not one bit, and try not to improve or regulate anybody but myself.

Just for today I will have a program, I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision.

Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective of my life.

Just for today I will be unafraid. Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful, and to believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me. 

中文:就为了今天,我将尽力只度过今天而不立刻去解决终身的问题。对一件令我沮丧而又必须坚持一辈子的事,我只能坚持十二个小时。

  就为了今天,我会很快乐。亚伯拉罕-林肯说过,“大多数人都是决定想怎么高兴就怎么高兴。”这已经被认为是真理。

  就为了今天,我会做自我调整适应事物本来的面目,而不是想方设法使每一件事满足自己的欲望。当机会来临的时候我会抓住它。

  就为了今天,我会尽力心强志坚。我会学习,学一些有用的东西。我不会做一个精神上的流浪汉。我会读一些需要努力、思考和注意力集中的东西。

  就为了今天,我会用三种方法来磨炼我的灵魂。我会做对某人有利的事但不能被发现,若有人发现了就不算数。我将会做至少两件我不愿做的事情——只为了磨练。我不会让任何人感到我的感情受到了伤害:它们可能受到了伤害,但今天我不想表现出来。

  就为了今天,我会过得很惬意。看起来我达到了最佳状态,穿着得体、讲话谦虚、行为礼貌、一点不吹毛求疵,尽量改进和调节自己而不是别人。

  就为了今天,我会制定一个计划,我也许不会严格地遵守它,但我一定要有计划。我会避免两种错误:仓促行事和优柔寡断。

  就为了今天,我将会独自静静地呆上半小时放松。在这半小时里,某个时刻,我会日后对我的生活有个更好的看法。

  就为了今天,我将不再害怕。尤其我不会再害怕享受美丽的事物,并且相信我给予世界的,世界也会给予我。

48.善心可依--感念我的父亲  A Good Heart to Lean on

When I was growing up, I was embarrassed to be seen with my father. He was severely crippled and very short, and when we would walk together, his hand on my arm for balance, people would stare. I would inwardly squirm at the unwanted attention. If he ever noticed or was bothered, he never let on. 

It was difficult to coordinate our steps — his halting, mine impatient — and because of that, we didn't say much as we went along. But as we started out, he always said, "You set the pace. I will try to adjust to you. " 

Our usual walk was to or from the subway, which was how he got to work. He went to work sick, and despite nasty weather. He almost never missed a day, and would make it to the office even if others could not. A matter of pride. 

When snow or ice was on the ground, it was impossible for him to walk, even with help. At such times my sisters or I would pull him through the streets of Brooklyn, NY, on a child's sleigh to the subway entrance. Once there, he would cling to the handrail until he reached the lower steps that the warmer tunnel air kept ice-free. In Manhattan the subway station was the basement of his office building, and he would not have to go outside again until we met him in Brooklyn on his way home. 

When I think of it now, I marvel at how much courage it must have taken for a grown man to subject himself to such indignity and stress. And at how he did it — without bitterness or complaint . 

He never talked about himself as an object of pity, nor did he show any envy of the more fortunate or able. What he looked for in others was a "good heart", and if he found one, the owner was good enough for him. 

Now that I am older, I believe that is a proper standard by which to judge people, even though I still don't know precisely what a "good heart" is. But I know the times I don't have one myself. 

Unable to engage in many activities, my father still tried to participate in some way. When a local sandlot baseball team found itself without a manager, he kept it going. He was a knowledgeable baseball fan and often took me to Ebbets Field to see the Brooklyn Dodgers play. He liked to go to dances and parties, where he could have a good time just sitting and watching. 

On one memorable occasion a fight broke out at a beach party, with everyone punching and shoving. He wasn't content to sit and watch, but he couldn't stand unaided on the soft sand. In frustration he began to shout, "I'll fight anyone who will sit down with me!" Nobody did. But the next day people kidded him by saying it was the first time any fighter was urged to take a dive even before the bout began. 

I now know he participated in some things vicariously through me, his only son. When I played ball (poorly), he "played" too. When I joined the Navy he "joined" too. And when I came home on leave, he saw to it that I visited his office. Introducing me, he was really saying, "This is my son, but it is also me, and I could have done this, too, if things had been different." Those words were never said aloud. 

He has been gone many years now, but I think of him often. I wonder if he sensed my reluctance to be seen with him during our walks. If he did, I am sorry. I never told him how sorry I was, how unworthy I was, how I regretted it. I think of him when I complain about trifles, when I am envious of another's good fortune, when I don't have a "good heart". 

At such times I put my hand on his arm to regain my balance, and say, "You set the pace, I will try to adjust to you." 

注:

1. cripple  v. 使残疾,损害           2. inwardly  adv. 在内心            3. squirm  v. 蠕动    

4. let on  泄密                            5. coordinate  v. (使)配合          6. adjust to  调整,使适合于

7. nasty  adj. 肮脏的,不愉快的           8. sleigh  n. 雪橇                           9. cling to  抓紧

10. handrail  n. (楼梯)扶手               11. basement n. 地下室                     12. marvel  v. 诧异

13. subject…to  使…经历                     14. indignity  n. 轻蔑,侮辱           15. punch  v. (用拳头)猛砸

16. shove  v. 推,乱推                         17. content  adj. 满意的                 18. frustration  n. 失望

19. take a dive  认输                              20. bout  n. 拳击比赛                    21. vicariously  adv. 可替代地

22. see to it that  保证                           23. envious  adj. 妒忌的

中文:

  在我成长的过程中,我一直羞于让别人看见的和父亲在一起。我的父亲身材矮小,腿上有严重的残疾。当我们一起走路时,他总是挽着我以保持身体平衡,这时总招来一些异样的目光,令我无地自容。可是如果他注意到了这些,不管他内心多么痛苦,也从不表现出来。

  走路时,我们很难相互协调起来----他的步子慢慢腾腾,我的步子焦燥不安。所以一路上我们交谈得很少。但是每次出行前,他总是说,“你走你的,我想法儿跟上你”。

  我们常常往返于从家到他上班乘坐的地铁站的那段路上。他有病也要上班,哪怕天气恶劣。他几乎从未误过一天工,就是在别人不能去的情况下,他也要设法去上班。实在值得骄傲!

  每当冰封大地,雪花飘飘的时候,若是没有帮助,他简直举步维艰。每当此时,我或我的姐妹们就用儿童雪橇把他拉过纽约布鲁克林区的街道,一直送他到地铁的入口处。一到那儿,他便手抓扶手一直走到底下的台阶时才放开手,因为那里通道的空气暖和些,地面上没有结冰。到了曼哈顿,地铁站就在他办公楼的地下一层,在我们在布鲁克林接他回家之前他无须再走出楼来。

  如今每当我想起这些,我惊叹一个成年男子要经受信这种侮辱和压力得需要多么大的勇气啊!叹服他竟然能够做到这一点,不带任何痛苦,没有丝毫抱怨。

  他从不说自己可怜,也从不嫉妒别人的幸运和能力。他所期望的是人家“善良的心”,当他得到时,便觉得人家真的对他很好。

  如今我已经长大成人,我明白了“善良的心”是评价人的恰当的标准,尽管我仍不很清楚它的确切含义,但是我却知道我有缺乏善心的时候。 

  虽然父亲不能参加许多活动,但他仍然没法以某种方式参与进来。当一个地方棒球队发现缺少一个领队时,他便作了领队。因为他是个棒球迷,有丰富的棒球知识,他过去常带我地埃比茨棒球场观看布鲁克林的鬼精灵队的比赛。他喜欢参加舞会和晚会,乐意坐着看。

  记得有一次的海边晚会上,有人打架,动了拳头,推推搡搡。他不甘于坐在那里当观众,但又无法在松软的沙滩上自己站起来。于是,失望之下,他吼了起来:“谁想坐下和我打?”没有人响应。但是第二天,人们都取笑他说,比赛还没开始,拳击手就被劝认输,这还是头一次看见。

  现在我知道一些事情他是通过我------他唯一的儿子来做的。当我打球时(尽管我打得很差),他也在“打球”。当我参加海军时,他也“参加”。当时我回家休息时,他一定要让我去他的办公室,在介绍我时,他真正想表达的是,“这是我儿子,但也是我自己,假如事情不是这样的话,我也会去参军的。”但这些话他从未大声说出来过。

  父亲离开我们已经很多年了,但是我时常想起他。我不知道他是否意识到我曾经不愿意让人看到和他走在一起的心理。假如他知道这一切,我现在感到很遗憾,因为我从没告诉过他我是多么愧疚、多么不孝、多么悔恨。每当我为一些琐事而抱怨时,为别人的好运而妒忌时,当我自己缺乏“善心”时,我就会想起我的父亲。

  此时,我会挽着他的胳膊保持身体平衡,并且说,“你走你的,我想法儿跟上你。”

49.MOTHER“母亲”的含义

"M" is for the million things she gave me,   "M"代表她所给予我的无数,

"O" means only that she's growing old,   "O"的意思是她在日渐老去,

"T" is for the tears she shed to save me,   "T"是她为抚育我洒下的泪,

"H" is for her heart of purest gold,   "H"指她有像金子一般的心灵,

"E" is for her eyes, with the love-light shining, "E"就是她的眼睛,里面洋溢着爱的光芒,

"R "means right, and right she'll always be, "R"的意思是正确,因为她永远都是对的。

Put them all together, they spell "MOTHER", 将以上字母串在一起就是"母亲(mother )",

A word that means the world to me. 这个是我整个的世界。

A mother's love is like a circle, it has no beginning and ending. It keeps going around and around ever expanding, touching everyone who comes in touch with it. Engulfing them like the morning's mist, warming them like the noontime sun, and covering them like a blanket of evening stars. A mother's love is like a circle, it has no beginning and ending.

母爱就像一个圆环,没有起点也没有终点。它源源不绝,广阔无边,感染着每个接触到它的人。它如晨雾的笼罩,如正午太阳般温暖,又如夜星,照耀着人们。母爱就像一个圆环,没有起点也没有终点。

■挫折中笑迎生活

母训:当遭遇失败或挫折时,你们都应该保持乐观的心理,坚信“一切都会好的”!

“Everything happens for the best,” my mother said whenever I faced disappointment.“If you carry on,one day something good will happen.And you’ll realize that it wouldn’t have happened if not for that previous disappointment.”

Mother was right,as I discovered after graduating from college in 1932,I had decided to try for a job in radio,then work my way up to sports announcer.I hitchhiked to Chicago and knocked on the door of every station——and got turned down every time.In one studio,a kind lady told me that big stations couldn’t risk hiring an inexperienced person.“Go out in the sticks and find a small station that’ll give you a chance,” she said.I thumbed home to Dixon,Illinois.

While there were no radio- announcing jobs in Dixon,my father said Montgomery Ward had opened a store and wanted a local athlete to manage its sports department.Since Dixon was where I had played high school football,I applied.The job sounded just right for me.But I wasn’t hired.My disappointment must have shown.“Everything happens for the best.” Mom reminded me.Dad offered me the car to hunt job.I tried WOC Radio in Davenport,Iowa.The program director,a wonderful Scotsman named Peter MacArthur told me they had already hired an announcer.

As I left his office,my frustration(挫折)boiled over.I asked aloud, “How can a fellow get to be a sports announcer if he can’t get a job in a radio station.” I was waiting for the elevator when I heard MacArthur calling, “What was you said about sports?Do you know anything about football?” Then he stood me before a microphone and asked me broadcast an imaginary game.The preceding(在前的)autumn,my team had won a game in the last 20 seconds with a 65-yard run. I did a 15-minute build-up to that play,and Peter told me I would be broadcasting Saturday’s game!On my way home,as I have many times since,I thought of my mother’s words:“If you carry on,one day something good will happen.Something wouldn’t have happened if not for that previous disappointment.”

I often wonder what direction my life might have taken if I’d not gotten the job at Montgomery Ward.

50.宽恕的艺术 Forgiveness

To forgive may be divine, but no one ever said it was easy. When someone has deeply hurt you, it can be extremely difficult to let go of your grudge. But forgiveness is possible -- and it can be surprisingly beneficial to your physical and mental health. 

"People who forgive show less depression, anger and stress and more hopefulness," says Frederic, Ph.D., author of Forgive for Good. "So it can help save on the wear and tear on our organs, reduce the wearing out of the immune system and allow people to feel more vital." 

So how do you start the healing? Try following these steps: 

Calm yourself. To defuse your anger, try a simple stress-management technique. "Take a couple of breaths and think of something that gives you pleasure: a beautiful scene in nature, someone you love," Frederic says. 

Don't wait for an apology. "Many times the person who hurt you has no intention of apologizing," Frederic says. "They may have wanted to hurt you or they just don't see things the same way. So if you wait for people to apologize, you could be waiting an awfully long time." Keep in mind that forgiveness does not necessarily mean reconciliation with the person who upset you or condoning of his or her action. 

Take the control away from your offender. Mentally replaying your hurt gives power to the person who caused you pain. "Instead of focusing on your wounded feelings, learn to look for the love, beauty and kindness around you," Frederic says. 

Try to see things from the other person's perspective. If you empathize with that person, you may realize that he or she was acting out of ignorance, fear -- even love. To gain perspective, you may want to write a letter to yourself from your offender's point of view. 

Recognize the benefits of forgiveness. Research has shown that people who forgive report more energy, better appetite and better sleep patterns. 

宽恕是神圣的,但是没有人说很容易做到宽恕别人。当你被深深伤害的时候,想要不怀恨在心是很难做到的。但是宽恕是可能的——而且这会给你的身心健康带来出乎意料的益处。

  《宽恕的好处》一书的作者弗雷德里克博士说。 “懂得宽恕的人不会感到那么沮丧、愤怒和紧张,他们总是充满希望。所以宽恕有助于减少人体各种器官的损耗,降低免疫系统的疲劳程度并使人精力更加充沛。”

  那么,如何恢复自己的情绪呢?试试下面的一些步骤吧:

  让自己冷静下来。尝试一种简单的减压技巧来缓解你愤怒的情绪。弗雷德里克建议:“做几次深呼吸,然后想想那些令你快乐的事情,比如自然界的美丽景色,或者你爱的人。”

  不要等别人来道歉。弗雷德里克说:“许多时候,伤害你的人没有想过要道歉。他们可能是故意的,也可能只是和你看待事物的方式不一样。所以如果你等着别人来道歉,你可能会等相当长的时间。”你要牢记,宽恕并不一定意味着顺从那些让你心烦意乱的人,也不意味着饶恕他或她的行为。

  不要让冒犯你的人控制你的情绪。内心里总是想着自己的伤痛,只会给伤害你的人打气。弗雷德里克说:“与其老是关注自己受到的伤害,还不如学着去寻找你身边的真善美。”

  试着从别人的角度来看问题。如果你站在别人的立场上,你也许会意识到他或她是因为无知、害怕、甚至是爱才那样做的。为了能够站在别人的角度来看问题,你可以从冒犯你的人的立场给你自己写一封信。

  认识到宽恕的益处。研究表明懂得宽恕的人精力更旺盛、食欲更好、睡觉更香。

结尾篇                    

这个世界本来就是痛苦的,没有例外的。

不要浪费你的生命,在你一定会后悔的地方上。

每一种创伤,都是一种成熟。狂妄的人有救,自卑的人没有救。

你要包容那些意见跟你不同的人,这样子日子比较好过。你要是一直想改变他,那样子你会很痛苦。要学学怎样忍受他才是。你要学学怎样包容他才是。

根本不必回头去看咒骂你的人是谁?如果有一条疯狗咬你一口,难道你也要趴下去反咬他一口吗?

时间总会过去的,让时间流走你的烦恼吧!

世界上没有一个永远不被毁谤的人,也没有一个永远被赞叹的人。当你话多的时候,别人要批评你,当你话少的时候,别人要批评你,当你沈默的时候,别人还是要批评你。在这个世界上,没有一个人不被批评的

不要因为众生的愚疑,而带来了自己的烦恼。不要因为众生的无知,而痛苦了你自己。

感谢上天我所拥有的,感谢上天我所没有的。

明天的希望,让我们忘了今天的痛苦

注意你的对手,因为他们往往最先发现你的错误。对手的指责教你自知,而向对手回击的最好方式是改正自己的错误。靠骨气挺直脊梁,靠正气树立形象,靠朝气迎来希望,靠勇气增添力量,靠志气实现理想,靠才气书写华章,靠人气团结兴旺。

做任何事,只要你迈出了第一步,然后再一步步地走下去,你就会逐渐靠近你的目的地。如果你知道你的具体的目的地,而且向它迈出了第一步,你便走上了成功之路!

成功之本取决于人的心理素质、人生态度和才能资质。当然,仅靠这个“本”还不够,必须兼具高远志向和实现目标的专心致志毅力。特别是专著于一的精神,更有利助人成功。

    好好的管教你自己,不要管别人。当你知道迷惑时,并不可怜,当你不知道迷惑时,才是最可怜的。

当我们仰首感叹如烟的往事时,不如低头照顾一下眼前的炉火;把握现在的光和热。当我们依恋枕边,想重拾昨夜的幻梦时,不如振奋而起,掌握美好的今天。

“学习跟吸收不是一件事吧?”我说。“固然不可分,但学习好比吃东西,吸收则是将食物转化为体能。不吃东西又怎么会有力量;不学习又如何吸收呢?”

 

其实,每一个泥人都有这样一颗心,就像我们每一个人都可能获得自己的天堂。关键是你想不想去获得,敢不敢去获得,会不会去获得,最后,怎样去理解和认识这种获得。

目光远大,目标明确的人往往非常自信,而自信与人生的成败息息相关。

 

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